"Girls don’t like being treated like every other girl, your woman wants to be shown that she’s different from the rest and that you know her better than anyone else. You show her that, she’ll say yes."
-MePreventable.
When you wanna see her and become acquainted, you get her, just the girl. When you wanna date her and become exclusive, you get her PLUS her best friends. When you wanna marry her and become her husband, you get her PLUS her best friends PLUS her family. So don’t complain when it all happens BECAUSE instead of keeping it simple with “just her”, you pried your way into HER life and made it complicated. Cause if you hadn’t involved yourself, she could have became happy minus your bullshit.
Nowadays.
“Not every woman wants to be in a relationship. Some just want good company. Someone to vibe with, converse with, laugh with & make funny faces at. Not every woman is in a rush. Start off simple & let the rest find itself. Because in all honesty, having someone to talk to & feeling comfortable around them, it’s a beautiful & good feeling. Minds connecting, both on on the same page. No bullshit. Just someone that actually listens to you, your thoughts & wonders.”
Why can’t I just date a guy and not call him my boyfriend? Why can’t I just have a relationship with somebody that I like talking to without all these strings? I just don’t get it. If I enjoy your company, forget the labels. Who cares?
What’s meant to be will be. If you talk to other girls, then I can’t really stop you from WANTING to talk to other girls. If I talk to other guys, you can’t stop me from wanting to talk to other guys.. so why do we try to limit our significant others? We just have to trust that what we can offer for them is enough. And if it isn’t, then just move on. Love is about that risk. You shouldn’t punish the person for doing what their heart desires, because if at that moment it doesn’t desire you, there’s either something wrong with the relationship or wrong with that person. So why even label a relationship? I’m not trying to trap someone into something with me. If I say I’m just talking to someone, regardless of the time, then I’m just talking to someone.. do not label my relationship with people for your benefit. (P.S. Like when someone tells me so-and-so is my boyfriend. WTF? Did I say he was? No. So STFU. Thanks.)
Sometimes I just want to have a good time. Flirting. Attraction. Things of that sort without the pressure of labels. Sometimes I feel like the thought of a relationship is going to kill that good mood feeling. I’m just saying that life throws us curveballs and God will deal out a weird hand but, you do what you gotta with what you got. If s/he’s talking to someone, yes it’s going to hurt but don’t concentrate on what happened but why and how you can prevent it from happening again. So if I say someone is my boyfriend, I’m not naming my property, I’m saying “I care about this person and they care about me. Come and dare and try to break our bond apart. He’s free to do what he wants. But in the end, he wants me. And he will always choose me. I dare you to try.” So I get excited when I care enough about someone and I actually invite home-wreckers to try to wreck it. And if they succeed, well they weren’t my meant to be, and I’ll hurt but I’ll find him eventually. But like I said, I’m not ready for that, I just want to vibe. So, let’s just vibe. (:
(Disclaimer: However, I’m not forgiving of home-wreckers. Especially marriage home-wreckers.)
Why Can’t Love Be Simple?
So I’ve always had a fairytale image of love. I’ve always had the idealistic view of it. The hopeless romantic lens of it. But there’s so much more you learn about relationships from being in one.. or several. I used to wish for the simple things, like if one likes other, and the other likes the one.. then live happily ever after. Why do we have to go through so many people to find the right one? Don’t make it complicated! Why do there have to be fights? Why do there have be any problems? Why can’t you see that love conquers all? *Sigh but no. Life is not that simple, so why would we ever think that our love lives are going to be simple? It’s not simple because I truly believe that there is ONE TRUE LOVE for you out there. There is someone out there that is the other half to you. The one that your soul has been searching for. It’s like a puzzle piece, very specific and very stubborn when it comes to love. So you have to keep trying to find that perfect fit because your heart will only accept one. And when you think you ALMOST got it, it’s ALMOST perfect, but it’s not quite right, it’s pretty frustrating right? But it’s okay because you ARE on the right track. So if you apply that to relationships, you can’t be “meant to be with” with every person you date, obviously. You can’t fit fit perfectly with more than one person. So I’ve grown to learn, that is why relationships are not simple. That’s why you fight to see what you like and what you don’t. If the relationship you’re in is not everything you wanted, but close to it, then you’re getting closer to THE ONE you’re meant to be in. It will be worth searching for because if you’re in a relationship where you ALMOST get everything you want, can you imagine a relationship better than that? It makes it all the more better when you find it though, because once you find it, you can finally say “I’ve gone through all this just to find you… and it was worth it.” And mean it.
How I Get Boys To Listen To Me.
You threaten to pull their armpit hair. Works every-fucking-single-time. ;)
Speaking of which, Alex is sitting on top of me right now, watching me type this, knowing it’s true. *Evil grin.* >;D
Photo Credits: Robbieniceone
Case of the Ex.
Dear Ex-who-never-appreciated-me,
Please stop trying to come back into my life. You no longer have that power over me that you had when I was 15-17. I was a young and dumb and completely infatuated with this idea of being in love. I was in love with the idea of changing a bad boy. I gave up so much for you, and yet you still don’t completely understand what I did for you. I alienated my family, I drove illegally, I alienated my friends, I was essentially grounded for 4 years.. and that’s just in a nutshell. I don’t know why you need to keep talking to me when it’s clear that I’m in a committed relationship. I’ve BEEN in a committed relationship for almost 3 years now. I’m not the girl you used to know. I’m not the girl that waited all night for your call that never ended up coming. You’re seriously a ridiculous boy. And I need you to grow up, get your shit together, stop assuming that we still have something, and maybe, just maybe we can be some kind of friends. But for now, goodbye.
- The girl you lost and will never have again.
p.s. Next time you wish me happy birthday, at least get the day right. You’re 2 days early.
So originally, I was going to reblog this yesterday, but my Safari crashed after I finished my long ass blog, and I didn’t feel like rewriting it ALL then. So here I am today to try to rummage up what I can remember. (:
I truly truly truly love success stories like this. I admire the strength. I admire the strength of the process to get where girls like mzxJoey are now. What I love most about this though, is that every single girl, once in their lifetime, at one point or another, will go through the waiting-all-night-by-the-phone-hoping-its-“him”-phase. The phase that can bring any strong woman down.. down to the level of being someone they never sought to be. We all make mistakes, and that “once in a lifetime” boy is not the “once in a lifetime” boy you want. We often mistake that.
So wait, I guess I lied, what I love most most about these stories, is where the girls end up aftermath. They’re not in that relationship with that guy that did that thing that hurt so bad that made them cry every night to sleep. No. The girls are stronger, better, and more confident of who they are than ever… without that guy. The girls can look into the eyes of the ex, and say, “I’m okay-no I’m better without you. I’m happy where I am.”
I reposted this, because let it be known to the girls going through the co-dependent, unhealthy relationSHITs right now, that there is ALWAYS a before and after. Speaking from my own personal experience, I recently just started to talk to my ex after a complete year of isolation from him. He kept persisting to see how I was, so I finally caved. Why? You might be asking, why? It’s because I got to the point that I didn’t feel remorse about the relationship anymore. I took it for what it was, and I moved on. I was never very good at holding grudges. Point being, he told me all the things I would have loved to hear… one year earlier; how much he missed me, how much he regrets ever letting me go, how much he loves me, how much happier he would be with me, etc. etc. But it all didn’t matter because he is no longer what I want or need in a relationship. I mean hell yeah, it’s nice to hear after all that time, but still, it doesn’t change anything. And it’s the girls who learn from relationships that realize that. Guys from the past, change, and maybe not so much in the way they want them to. They’re no longer the same guy they once knew. And the girls realize, they, themselves, as well changed. So they no longer have the same wants and needs.
I guess what I’m trying to say is. Learning to let go is an awesome part of the relationship cycle. You get to learn so much more about yourself in the end. So don’t let that ex have the opportunity to say different. mzxjoey didn’t, and she’s in a “srsly seriously relationship.” (:
P.S. I love my twin-ish gf mzxjoey. She helped me a lot through my relationship by talking to me about some of her trials of her own. So there’s another piece of advice, help your gfs out! There’s nothing better than going through a relationshit than to have your gfs by your side—if you haven’t completely isolated them, by that point. =P
Photo Credits: Cat Klein
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Mariah Carey & Young Jeezy - Side Effects
I’ve always loved this song, so I decided to share the world with this. I went through a situation exactly described in the song, so what I say girls, is BE STRONG. You’ll get through.
